How to Start an Anonymous Blog Without Losing Your Mind (or Identity)

How to Start an Anonymous Blog Without Losing Your Mind (or Identity)

So, you want to share your thoughts with the world but also not have Auntie Gloria judging your midnight rants or your high school crush realizing you still write poetry about them? Welcome, friend — you’re not alone. Anonymous blogging is the digital version of wearing sunglasses indoors: mysterious, dramatic, and just a little rebellious.

Let’s get you started, the easy (and slightly funny) way:

1. Pick a Cool Fake Name

Think of something that says “I’m deep and anonymous” but also “I totally have snacks next to my laptop.”

Some ideas:

The Wandering Wi-Fi

Midnight Muffin

Miss/Mr. NoFace

The Silent Typist

Bonus tip: Use a name that would confuse your stalkers and your nosy cousin.

2. Choose a Blogging Platform That Respects Your Mystery

Go for platforms like:

WordPress.com – you can hide your identity and disable comments (because trolls are not welcome).

Blogger – old but gold.

Substack – great for emails and essays.

Tumblr – for chaotic genius energy.

Use a separate email address — don’t be that person who signs up with their real name and ends up exposed like a forgotten lasagna in the microwave.

3. Don’t Overshare… Duh

Keep your real name, location, school, cat’s name, and that weird birthmark story OFF the blog.

Write about what matters, what you love, or what’s bothering you — but cloak it in storytelling, metaphors, and dramatic pauses. Like this:

> “I once loved someone who hated pineapple pizza… it didn’t work out.”

4. Use a VPN or Incognito Mode If You’re REALLY Paranoid

Let’s be honest, if you’re planning to drop some spicy truths, you might as well do it with a cyber-ninja outfit on. A VPN hides your IP like Harry Potter’s invisibility cloak.

5. Keep It Fun. Keep It Real-ish.

Just because you're anonymous doesn’t mean you have to sound like a robot with Wi-Fi issues. Let your voice shine — whisper your wildest dreams, shout your opinions into the blogosphere, and dance in the comments (if you allow them). You’re anonymous, not boring.

6. Tell NO ONE… At First

Don’t tell your friends. Don’t tell your dog. Definitely don’t tell your little brother (he’ll blackmail you for snacks).

Let your blog grow quietly like a secret garden, until you're ready to share it or keep it forever like your favorite hoodie.

Final Words from One Anon to Another:

Blogging anonymously is a safe, fun way to be fully you without anyone stopping you. Whether you're spilling your soul, writing fiction, or just need to vent, do it bravely… and sneakily.

Now go start that blog and let your inner ninja-poet-activist-singer-weirdo shine.