Saturday, 31 May 2025

🎬THE CINEMA IS DEAD?!? Wait… WHAT IN THE BLUE SMURF IS GOING ON?! 😳💔

🎬THE CINEMA IS DEAD?!? Wait… WHAT IN THE BLUE SMURF IS GOING ON?! 😳💔
It’s official.
Ster-Kinekor — one of the last standing giants of South African cinema — is closing down its cinema in a major Cape Town mall.

Let that sink in.

No, seriously, breathe. Inhale. Exhale.
Because this might be the beginning of the final curtain call for cinemas in South Africa.

🏢 Which Ster-Kinekor and Why Is It Closing?

Reports say the closure is due to financial strain, a massive drop in foot traffic, and the cold, hard truth: people aren’t going to the movies anymore.
They’re just… not.

Why?
Because why pay R120 for a ticket, another R80 for popcorn and a Coke, and your soul for transport, when you can just download a movie on Moviebox (yes, that shady lil' app we all know) for free and watch it in your pajamas at 2 AM while eating bread?

That’s the reality now.
Sad? Definitely.
Surprising? Not really.




🥲 A Personal Cinema Eulogy (From Someone Who Barely Went)

Now let me get a little personal here.

The last time I went to the cinema?
I think it was in 2017. We went to watch a Smurf movie — and don’t ask me which one, I just know there were blue people jumping around on a big screen and it was my friend’s birthday. That’s all I remember.

Before that? I was like 2, to 4 years old when I last set foot in a cinema. It’s honestly wild.
As a child, I used to dream of celebrating my birthday at the cinema like the cool kids.
But then? Reality said, “You? Cinema party? Hah. Be serious.”
Because you see... financial struggles are a curse. I’m telling you, they limit everything. From small joys to big dreams.




💔 What This Closure Really Means

Let’s not lie — this is bigger than a single cinema closing.

This means:

More unemployment in South Africa.

Less space for real-life memories.

Children of Gen Alpha and beyond will grow up never knowing the magic of watching a movie in a giant, dark room with strangers, hearing the sound explode through surround speakers.

Cinemas? They’ll be something you only see in cartoons, old movies, or your parents’ “back in my day…” stories.


It’s giving extinction. It’s giving history.
It’s giving, “We used to go to those things called cinemas, sweetie, now eat your cereal and watch Netflix.”




📉 The Harsh Truth Nobody Wants to Admit

Cinema operators, you’ve got to face it.
Your era is ending.

You can’t compete with streaming anymore — it’s fast, convenient, free (or creatively free, if you know what I mean).
No one is rushing to the mall anymore just to sit in a cold theatre to watch a film they could find online with subtitles, behind-the-scenes, and a reaction video — all in one sitting.




😔 Final Thoughts: I'm Mad. I'm Sad. But Mostly, I'm... Tired.

I’m disappointed. Not because I was a loyal cinema-goer (clearly I wasn’t), but because the idea of cinema — the fantasy, the community, the vibe — is dying.

Even though I didn't go to the cinema often, I always felt like I still could. That it was there. That maybe one day I’d have enough to rent out a whole cinema for my birthday, or just treat myself to that experience.

Now? I can’t even pretend that dream is realistic anymore.

This is more than just a movie theatre closing.
This is another space of joy and escape being erased.
And as someone who’s lived with limitations, this hits deep.

So, yeah. Rest in peace to the cinemas.
Say hi to Blockbuster in heaven. Tell it we miss it. 🕊️🎥




By someone who just wanted a popcorn birthday party once in their life.
(And maybe one last look at the Smurfs on a big screen.)

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